Sonic Adventure

If Mario was gay his name would be Sonic the hedgehog. Sonic Adventure was an attempt from Sega to put Sonic in 3D. Sadly this idea is flawed because all Sonic is good for is running fast in 2D sidescrolling. The game caused Sonic to drastically slow down and is the main reason why sonic team and Sega suck today. Most people hail this as the Great Sonic game or 3D platformer, but it should be noted that these people are retarded and no one takes them seriously. Another thing this game made were controls so awful you would always manage to take Sonic off a cliff and a camera that would fuck up and make things damn near impossible to see. But all these things pale in comparison to the Addition of Amy. It’s as if Sega thought that having and 8 year old fox with 2 tails wasn’t gay enough. Now she plagues every game and there are disgusting doujishins. The game however did make something good. The fucking chaos managed to shadow anything else in the game. I’m serious I could spend hours collecting cute animals to feed it to my chaos so they would then more into that cute animal after they sucked their souls. It was also fun to throw them and see how far they could go. That was a fun mini-gam…. Nevermind it wasn’t a mini-game it was the only fun thing to do in the game.

The controls changed from holding down the D-Pad right for 15 minutes to innovatively holding down the D-Pad up for 15 minutes while trying to keep a shitty camera from killing you. Let’s see how the ratings set up.

Graphics: The looks of an either great N64 game or shitty PS2 game. You decide… 7/10

Controls: Hold Down D-pad up for 15 minutes all the while trying to control a glitchy camera=Hours of mind numbing frustration. 5/10

Sound: Rejected 80s Rock metal blares on a repeated loop as you run for 15 minutes. If it’s not rejected 80s hair metal then it is some other headache inducing crap. 6/10

Replay value: Not much unless you count ports which we don’t. 2/10

Overall: I don’t hate sonic or Sega it’s just that this game is overrated and was the demise for Sonic. 5.5/10

Added: Sat Dec 29, 2007 4:00 pm
Reviewer: Joey Redd
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